While a person’s personality and history are largely fixed, he or she can add to themselves new ways of dealing with problems. The ways added are usually simple (though not necessarily easy) and often are already known and used in other parts of the person’s life.  Successful counseling depends upon the person’s understanding the new ways, applying them in the problem situations, and mindfully practicing.

 

I will begin by asking for basic information about your background, marriage and children,  education, work, who you live with, health, medications, prior treatment, what prompts your coming to counseling now, you main problem, etc. Then I want to hear your story. I'll ask how you felt, what you thought, and what you did then. And I'll ask how you feel now, what your think now, and what you do about it now. 

 I don't just sit and listen or just ask, "How do you feel about that?" Once we establish a list of problems and goals, my role is to be a supportive, active coach. I make coaching suggestions and ask you to practice the strategies and tactics we discuss--"The power is in the practice."